Hi all! Time again for List Day. Today's list is in honor of my car's rear bumper, which was smashed to holy hell last night by an unknown jerky assailant who didn't bother to leave a note. Probably just as well because I'm sure he or she didn't have insurance anyway, but I am still pissed. Anyhoo, the list for today is:
Bumper Stickers that Annoy Me!
1. Stickers announcing the car owner/driver's support for a past presidential campaign. Fool, it is seriously time for you to scrape that "Hoover/Curtis '28" sticker off your bumper. Dude has exhausted his maximum allotted terms and been out of office for 394782139 years already. Let's move on.
2. "It's a Jeep thing...you wouldn't understand" stickers. These are stupid. No, I don't understand, because I don't drive a Jeep. I hate that kind of elitist bumper sticker propaganda. They should make them for everyone's car. I should have one on MY back window that says, "It's a Mitsubishi 4-cylinder sedan thing...you wouldn't understand."
3. "If you can read this..." bumper stickers. All these do is force me to inch my car even closer to the car with the sticker, because I want to know what it says. Bumper stickers that encourage tailgating are probably a bad idea.
4. OBX stickers and the like. It took me like half my life to figure out that "OBX" stands for "Outer Banks, NC". But what do all the other random ones stand for? I can't deal with the frustration of trying to figure out the other jumbles of letters that apparently signify an undisclosed geographic locale. I am driving along like, "What the hell does 'ZXK' stand for?!"
5. Giant soccer ball stickers. Do you really want to advertise to the whole entire driving population that you're a soccer mom? Come on, we already figured it out by the fact that your SUV/minivan is the size of the state of Nevada, and there is nary a horse trailer, large motorboat, or tow hitch in sight. Doy.
In other news, after church on Easter Sunday, in the parking lot we saw a car that had giant fake eyelashes on its headlights. I thought it was the cutest thing. I asked the car owner where they got them and they told me about Carlashes.com. I would buy them for my car, but my car is a boy.
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Thursday, April 14, 2011
List Day - All-time Favorite Albums
OK, I already broke a promise to blog more often. But I've had about 2983742 stationery orders to work on this week so I hope people will forgive me. Anyway, I present to you List Day for this week, Grace's Favorite Albums of All time. This list doesn't contain compilations (like greatest hits albums), classical music, or soundtracks...I think those all belong in their own categories. Here they are, in order:
5. Paul Simon - Graceland (1986). I love this album because it's such an eclectic mix of styles. He blends Cajun and African music (and features Linda Ronstadt on one track, whose voice I love), and it is just an amazing collection of music.
Until next week my friends...feel free to comment with your own picks for your fave albums of all time and suggest to me another list I can do next week, because I am too lazy to do it on my own right now.
Monday, April 11, 2011
No seriously, WORST. BLOGGER. EVER.
Nice. I haven't posted on here since 2009. So, now I am saying to myself, "Either have a blog, or don't have a blog, a-hole." I answer myself that I do want a blog, because it's a good way to share news and stuff I'm doing, and sometimes I can post stuff on there that I wouldn't put on Facebook. I realize that that makes me sound kind of self-absorbed, but if you know me (which you probs do if you're reading my blog), you know that's not me at all, so I'm not too worried about it.
Well, since I've been away from this blog, lots of stuff has happened. I've been doing a lot of scrapbooking, a lot of invitation design (will soon have a website that I can link to actually), and have also started volunteering at DAWS (Danbury Animal Welfare Society) which has basically changed my life. Animals rule. I should have known all along that I should be working around animals in some way on a regular basis, so I'm glad I finally got my head out of an area in which it shouldn't have been and decided to volunteer there. The critters are great and the people are awesome. YAY for DAWS. Check out our website and adopt a kitty or a doggie, or multiple kitties or doggies, from us!
Anyhoo, I'm planning on taking a bit of a new direction with this bad boy. I have been inspired by people from the scrapbooking community and would like to start posting pictures of my work on here, to get feedback and also just to show what I'm working on. I also figure it's a good idea for me to make some kind of attempt at regular posting, so from now on, every Tuesday will be "List Day". I love making lists, and this way I have a prompt once a week about something to write about, whether it's a list of songs I hate or things I would like to do before I die or whatever. I will be happy to accept suggestions for lists that people want to see, and I want people to post in the comments with their own lists for whatever topic I've posted. It is a stupid thing to write about, but my good friend, an author, says that anything that gets you to write is a good thing, and she is smart so I should take her advice :) So tomorrow is the first List Day.
Whee! I guess that's it for now. I seriously suck as a blogger, but will try to be a better one. Thanks for reading, and thanks for sticking with me even though the last time I posted was apparently during the Van Buren administration.
Well, since I've been away from this blog, lots of stuff has happened. I've been doing a lot of scrapbooking, a lot of invitation design (will soon have a website that I can link to actually), and have also started volunteering at DAWS (Danbury Animal Welfare Society) which has basically changed my life. Animals rule. I should have known all along that I should be working around animals in some way on a regular basis, so I'm glad I finally got my head out of an area in which it shouldn't have been and decided to volunteer there. The critters are great and the people are awesome. YAY for DAWS. Check out our website and adopt a kitty or a doggie, or multiple kitties or doggies, from us!
Anyhoo, I'm planning on taking a bit of a new direction with this bad boy. I have been inspired by people from the scrapbooking community and would like to start posting pictures of my work on here, to get feedback and also just to show what I'm working on. I also figure it's a good idea for me to make some kind of attempt at regular posting, so from now on, every Tuesday will be "List Day". I love making lists, and this way I have a prompt once a week about something to write about, whether it's a list of songs I hate or things I would like to do before I die or whatever. I will be happy to accept suggestions for lists that people want to see, and I want people to post in the comments with their own lists for whatever topic I've posted. It is a stupid thing to write about, but my good friend, an author, says that anything that gets you to write is a good thing, and she is smart so I should take her advice :) So tomorrow is the first List Day.
Whee! I guess that's it for now. I seriously suck as a blogger, but will try to be a better one. Thanks for reading, and thanks for sticking with me even though the last time I posted was apparently during the Van Buren administration.
Friday, December 4, 2009
I'm the worst blogger ever
Seriously! I haven't updated since October...that is dumb. My early New Year's resolution is to blog more often.
Anyway, since I last posted, Shawn and I went on a freaking great vacation to The Atlantis in the Bahamas. It was SO MUCH FUN, we totally didn't want to come home. For your viewing pleasure, here is a video (complete with music haha) of some of our favorite pics from our vacation (also some videos within the slideshow, like of us going down the Leap of Faith Mayan Temple slide, which is scary as all hell).
Obviously, we had a great time. I would highly recommend a trip to The Atlantis...there is seriously something there for everyone. There's something to see and do around every corner, lots of places to explore, and if you plan it right, I really don't think it's that much more expensive than any other tropical vacation. All that being said, here are a few tips we would give to anyone planning a trip down there:
1. When they tell you to make restaurant reservations before you get there, they're not kidding. I didn't listen, and had trouble trying to get into a couple of the restaurants (like Bobby Flay's Mesa Grill, at which we ate at the bar because the whole place was booked up for three days. No big deal, it was still awesome, but maybe would have been more awesome if we'd been able to get a table.)
2. The food is great, but pretty expensive. We didn't end up with $827568276 in credit card debt when we got home, only because we specifically decided NOT to charge any of our dinners to the room. We either paid cash or used a debit card. We also were real careful while sitting by the pool ordering daiquiris...that is where they get you.
3. We found the best deals for food were at the following two restaurants: Murray's Deli (which also has the best potato salad I have ever had, bar none) and Carmine's (family style Italian restaurant. We ordered a salad and one entree and it was DEFINITELY enough food for two people...the portions are gigantic.)
4. The Atlantis meal plans seem to be a waste of money for two people. The meal plans only cover breakfast and dinner (and don't cover alcohol at all), and since we knew there was very little chance we'd ever be up in time for breakfast the whole week we were there, we skipped the meal plan and we were glad we did. We had coffee and Nutri-Grain bars in the room every morning, and just had lunch and dinner every day.
5. When going on the waterslides that require inner tubes, keep your butt up as much as possible. I got a gigantic bruise on one of the slides & couldn't sit for two days.
So all in all, get yourself down there if you can. It was one of the best vacations I've ever been on (and I'd been there before). Frigging awesome!
Anyway, since I last posted, Shawn and I went on a freaking great vacation to The Atlantis in the Bahamas. It was SO MUCH FUN, we totally didn't want to come home. For your viewing pleasure, here is a video (complete with music haha) of some of our favorite pics from our vacation (also some videos within the slideshow, like of us going down the Leap of Faith Mayan Temple slide, which is scary as all hell).
Obviously, we had a great time. I would highly recommend a trip to The Atlantis...there is seriously something there for everyone. There's something to see and do around every corner, lots of places to explore, and if you plan it right, I really don't think it's that much more expensive than any other tropical vacation. All that being said, here are a few tips we would give to anyone planning a trip down there:
1. When they tell you to make restaurant reservations before you get there, they're not kidding. I didn't listen, and had trouble trying to get into a couple of the restaurants (like Bobby Flay's Mesa Grill, at which we ate at the bar because the whole place was booked up for three days. No big deal, it was still awesome, but maybe would have been more awesome if we'd been able to get a table.)
2. The food is great, but pretty expensive. We didn't end up with $827568276 in credit card debt when we got home, only because we specifically decided NOT to charge any of our dinners to the room. We either paid cash or used a debit card. We also were real careful while sitting by the pool ordering daiquiris...that is where they get you.
3. We found the best deals for food were at the following two restaurants: Murray's Deli (which also has the best potato salad I have ever had, bar none) and Carmine's (family style Italian restaurant. We ordered a salad and one entree and it was DEFINITELY enough food for two people...the portions are gigantic.)
4. The Atlantis meal plans seem to be a waste of money for two people. The meal plans only cover breakfast and dinner (and don't cover alcohol at all), and since we knew there was very little chance we'd ever be up in time for breakfast the whole week we were there, we skipped the meal plan and we were glad we did. We had coffee and Nutri-Grain bars in the room every morning, and just had lunch and dinner every day.
5. When going on the waterslides that require inner tubes, keep your butt up as much as possible. I got a gigantic bruise on one of the slides & couldn't sit for two days.
So all in all, get yourself down there if you can. It was one of the best vacations I've ever been on (and I'd been there before). Frigging awesome!
Friday, October 16, 2009
I Met Richard Belzer, And I Babbled Like Such An Idiot I Might As Well Have Been Speaking Klingon
Long post. You have been warned.
My name is Grace. I am a Law and Order: SVU addict.
So when I read on the Interwebs that Richard Belzer was going to be doing an appearance at a Barnes & Noble in the city for his new book, I Am Not A Psychic!, I was like WORD. I need to go to this. All week I was hemming and hawing though, since I knew the weather would be crappy and I had a lot to do this week, but finally I decided yesterday (the day of the event mind you) that if I didn’t go I would majorly regret it and anyway I was planning on buying the book, so why not buy it there and get it signed by the man himself?
GOOD CALL, GRACE. I am telling you, it was the coolest thing I have done this week by far. $24 for the book and I got to sit 6 feet away from a comedy legend for an hour? Totally worth it. Now, I wasn’t familiar with Belzer back in the day when he was doing stand-up, so I really only know him from Law and Order, but let me tell you: THIS MAN. IS HILARIOUS. I skipped the gym yesterday but I got an ab workout all the same because I didn’t stop laughing the entire time. It is seriously amazing how this guy can play Detective Munch, an arguably serious character on a very serious show, and also be this hysterically funny comedian, so he’s the man. Here is the story of how I met my favorite actor on my favorite show and didn’t manage to pass out.
I left work yesterday and drove home (in the snow!) to get a different coat, a scarf, and some gloves, and feed the cat, and yet somehow I still made it to Katonah to catch a 5:00 train (when I manage to catch a train that I was planning on taking, it automatically starts things off on a positive note). I got into the city, scooted uptown to 66th and Broadway, and found where they were selling the book which was right next to the event room where we would be. I bought the book, got my bracelet, and went to hang out in the line until they opened the doors.
I don’t know if it was the weather or what, but once they let us in it became apparent that by no chance was the place going to be full, so that was cool. I got a seat right across from the podium in the third row and for once, Yao Ming or whatever didn’t sit in front of me so I would have a perfect view. While we were waiting, I pulled out Shawn’s camera which I had borrowed for the occasion to make sure it was set up for when Belzer got there, but to my EXTREME TERROR it gave me this message saying “No Memory Card”. GOD ALMIGHTY, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?! So I somehow struck up conversation with this girl sitting in the row in front of me and lo and behold she had a SPARE MEMORY CARD and she GAVE it to me. Whoever this girl is, I love her to the high heavens. A thousand blessings upon her home! I would have been so screwed without that memory card!
Belzer comes in, holding his cute doggie Bebe (I think he is a poodle fox terrier or something like that). He is dressed all in black and yes, he has the sunglasses on. He says “Hi kids! I’ll be back” and goes into the side room. While we’re waiting the Barnes & Noble dude who was running things walked around with some yellow Post-Its saying that Mr. Belzer would be personalizing his books at the signing and asked us what we wanted written and wrote it on the yellow Post-Its so we could stick them in our books.
Once Belzer got started, it was complete and nonstop laughter for the entire time. He read a bit from the book, took questions from the audience, and pretty much just made us laugh constantly. He does the whole “interact/make fun of the audience” thing which I always love when comedians do that. He does a KILLER Jackie Mason impersonation. There was a man in the audience who was clearly from another country, and at one point he raised his hand and asked Belzer “I see this word ‘f---‘ a lot in your books, what does it mean?” and Belzer had a field day with that one (although I’m not entirely convinced that he didn’t know the guy and they had set it up beforehand). He talked a bit about the show which is always fun to hear and it was also interesting to hear about his writing process (for those of you who don’t know, this book and the previous one, I Am Not A Cop!, are fictional mysteries but use him with his real name as the main character). Then it was time for the signing.
The first thing I do is I tell Belzer that it’s the 5-year anniversary of my first date with my husband and I’m there instead of at home. He goes, “Well, where the hell is your husband?” and I told him he had to work late and I wanted to get into the city early. That was ok. But then I proceed to F it all up by telling Belzer about how it is snowing in his home state (yes, he is from Connecticut originally). YES, I AM STANDING IN FRONT OF RICHARD BELZER, TALKING ABOUT THE WEATHER. How about, “Mr. Belzer, this was so cool, I love your work” or “You’re the main reason I watch Law and Order” or something to that effect? NOPE. THE MOTHERF---ING WEATHER. I suck at life. So, just in case Richard Belzer ever reads my blog, and actually makes it through this long-ass post, here is what I SHOULD HAVE SAID:
Hi Mr. Belzer! My name is Grace. I love your show, and I think you are awesome on it. You’re the main reason I watch it and I think it’s so cool that you currently hold the record for playing the same character on the most different TV shows. Sorry I was blubbering like a goddamn monkey when I met you. I really can be quite eloquent when I want to. I love your dog! My friend lives near you and brings her dog to the same park where you go. I admire your work with the North Shore Animal League. I really enjoyed this evening and haven’t laughed this hard in a long time. I am looking forward to reading your book.
Apparently it is too much to ask that I look good in a photo with my favorite actor, but I think it is a great picture of him. But then again, I doubt if he ever takes a bad photo. Also, Bebe is cute. It was cool to have him in the picture too. I want a dog.
I was grinning like an idiot and he thanked me for coming out and smiled, and I went on my merry way with my book and my photo. It was a great night and a great end to the week! I would have regretted it so much if I hadn’t gone. If I have the chance to meet him again, hopefully I won’t sound like such a moron and could actually have a real conversation with him. But until then, I can at least say I met Richard Belzer!!!
My name is Grace. I am a Law and Order: SVU addict.
So when I read on the Interwebs that Richard Belzer was going to be doing an appearance at a Barnes & Noble in the city for his new book, I Am Not A Psychic!, I was like WORD. I need to go to this. All week I was hemming and hawing though, since I knew the weather would be crappy and I had a lot to do this week, but finally I decided yesterday (the day of the event mind you) that if I didn’t go I would majorly regret it and anyway I was planning on buying the book, so why not buy it there and get it signed by the man himself?
GOOD CALL, GRACE. I am telling you, it was the coolest thing I have done this week by far. $24 for the book and I got to sit 6 feet away from a comedy legend for an hour? Totally worth it. Now, I wasn’t familiar with Belzer back in the day when he was doing stand-up, so I really only know him from Law and Order, but let me tell you: THIS MAN. IS HILARIOUS. I skipped the gym yesterday but I got an ab workout all the same because I didn’t stop laughing the entire time. It is seriously amazing how this guy can play Detective Munch, an arguably serious character on a very serious show, and also be this hysterically funny comedian, so he’s the man. Here is the story of how I met my favorite actor on my favorite show and didn’t manage to pass out.
I left work yesterday and drove home (in the snow!) to get a different coat, a scarf, and some gloves, and feed the cat, and yet somehow I still made it to Katonah to catch a 5:00 train (when I manage to catch a train that I was planning on taking, it automatically starts things off on a positive note). I got into the city, scooted uptown to 66th and Broadway, and found where they were selling the book which was right next to the event room where we would be. I bought the book, got my bracelet, and went to hang out in the line until they opened the doors.
I don’t know if it was the weather or what, but once they let us in it became apparent that by no chance was the place going to be full, so that was cool. I got a seat right across from the podium in the third row and for once, Yao Ming or whatever didn’t sit in front of me so I would have a perfect view. While we were waiting, I pulled out Shawn’s camera which I had borrowed for the occasion to make sure it was set up for when Belzer got there, but to my EXTREME TERROR it gave me this message saying “No Memory Card”. GOD ALMIGHTY, ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?! So I somehow struck up conversation with this girl sitting in the row in front of me and lo and behold she had a SPARE MEMORY CARD and she GAVE it to me. Whoever this girl is, I love her to the high heavens. A thousand blessings upon her home! I would have been so screwed without that memory card!
Belzer comes in, holding his cute doggie Bebe (I think he is a poodle fox terrier or something like that). He is dressed all in black and yes, he has the sunglasses on. He says “Hi kids! I’ll be back” and goes into the side room. While we’re waiting the Barnes & Noble dude who was running things walked around with some yellow Post-Its saying that Mr. Belzer would be personalizing his books at the signing and asked us what we wanted written and wrote it on the yellow Post-Its so we could stick them in our books.
Once Belzer got started, it was complete and nonstop laughter for the entire time. He read a bit from the book, took questions from the audience, and pretty much just made us laugh constantly. He does the whole “interact/make fun of the audience” thing which I always love when comedians do that. He does a KILLER Jackie Mason impersonation. There was a man in the audience who was clearly from another country, and at one point he raised his hand and asked Belzer “I see this word ‘f---‘ a lot in your books, what does it mean?” and Belzer had a field day with that one (although I’m not entirely convinced that he didn’t know the guy and they had set it up beforehand). He talked a bit about the show which is always fun to hear and it was also interesting to hear about his writing process (for those of you who don’t know, this book and the previous one, I Am Not A Cop!, are fictional mysteries but use him with his real name as the main character). Then it was time for the signing.
At this point I was about ready to have a panic attack. I am not good at meeting famous people and I have never met one that I heart as much as Richard Belzer, so I’m standing there thinking OMG, what in the holy hell do I say to him when I get up there? Since there were so few people he actually was kind of talking to everyone for a bit when they got up to have their books signed, so now I am facing the prospect of having a brief conversation with him. I move up in the line and start talking to the two ladies in front of me. I watch as this one girl a couple people ahead of us has her picture taken with him, so now I know he will maybe take a picture with me if I ask, and I ask the lady in front of me to take a picture for me when I get there. I get up to the table and I’m petting Bebe the doggie (he’s super cute!) and then it is my turn.
The first thing I do is I tell Belzer that it’s the 5-year anniversary of my first date with my husband and I’m there instead of at home. He goes, “Well, where the hell is your husband?” and I told him he had to work late and I wanted to get into the city early. That was ok. But then I proceed to F it all up by telling Belzer about how it is snowing in his home state (yes, he is from Connecticut originally). YES, I AM STANDING IN FRONT OF RICHARD BELZER, TALKING ABOUT THE WEATHER. How about, “Mr. Belzer, this was so cool, I love your work” or “You’re the main reason I watch Law and Order” or something to that effect? NOPE. THE MOTHERF---ING WEATHER. I suck at life. So, just in case Richard Belzer ever reads my blog, and actually makes it through this long-ass post, here is what I SHOULD HAVE SAID:
Hi Mr. Belzer! My name is Grace. I love your show, and I think you are awesome on it. You’re the main reason I watch it and I think it’s so cool that you currently hold the record for playing the same character on the most different TV shows. Sorry I was blubbering like a goddamn monkey when I met you. I really can be quite eloquent when I want to. I love your dog! My friend lives near you and brings her dog to the same park where you go. I admire your work with the North Shore Animal League. I really enjoyed this evening and haven’t laughed this hard in a long time. I am looking forward to reading your book.
So I managed to recover just enough to ask politely for a photo (I wonder if it weirds him out when people call him “Mr. Belzer” as I’m sure most people don’t, but I’m a paeon and I’m sure as hell not going to assume familiarity with this legend of the comedy world by calling him “Richard” or “Belz” or something). He told me to lean in, which I did, and I got the following:
Apparently it is too much to ask that I look good in a photo with my favorite actor, but I think it is a great picture of him. But then again, I doubt if he ever takes a bad photo. Also, Bebe is cute. It was cool to have him in the picture too. I want a dog.I was grinning like an idiot and he thanked me for coming out and smiled, and I went on my merry way with my book and my photo. It was a great night and a great end to the week! I would have regretted it so much if I hadn’t gone. If I have the chance to meet him again, hopefully I won’t sound like such a moron and could actually have a real conversation with him. But until then, I can at least say I met Richard Belzer!!!
Monday, October 5, 2009
Things That Grind My Gears!
As a disclaimer for this Monday’s edition of Things That Grind My Gears, stop reading now if you are into Jon & Kate Plus 8 (or, Kate Plus 8 as it apparently will now be called).
1. Dude. I don’t know about anyone else, but I am SO SICK of hearing about Jon & Kate! I hate these people, and I don’t even know them. Every freaking media outlet in this country is completely mired in their drama at the moment, and I am sick as all holy hell of it. I turn on the radio? Jon & Kate. I turn on the news? Jon & Kate. I half expect to start seeing mosaics of them and collages of their life in museums. Seriously, media. Stop giving these people attention – that is all they want. He is a douche, she is a shrew. And unfortunately, neither of them, despite their many affirmations to the contrary, gives a rat’s ass about any of their kids, or else they wouldn’t be using them as leverage in their obnoxious he-said-she-said game. I don’t care who was at fault, and neither does anyone else. As far as I’m concerned, you’re both at fault. Watching that show was like watching a real-life Everybody Loves Raymond…husband is a lazy obnoxious pig, wife considered nagging her husband to be as necessary to her daily routine as breathing. I’m serious, if I EVER treat my husband like that, I want someone to shoot me. But I never WILL, because he would never act like Jon Gosselin to begin with, so it’s a moot point. Anyhoo, the people who are really suffering here are the innocent children…and the rest of America, who, like me, just want to stop hearing about this shit 28475682101 times a day.
2. I really like the fall, but the constant fluctuation in the temperature is seriously messing with me. Last week it was nice and cool and breezy, like fall weather should be, and yet this weekend, it was back to being 14 trillion degrees with 90% humidity. I am DONE with summer, I am over it (of course I was over it in June…I really don’t like summer to begin with, but that’s beside the point). PLEASE bring back the fall weather! And please do it soon! HOWEVER, if the gods of Fall Weather could bring it back WITHOUT the accompanying invasion of f-ing spiders into my house because the weather’s getting colder, that would be STELLAR. I swear, everywhere I looked this weekend in my house, I saw a spider. And Husband was not home to go all vigilante on them, so I cowered in fear in my car for most of the weekend hoping that they would all disappear. They did not. I loathe spiders, in case you people were wondering (except for Josephine, referred to in an earlier post…RIP Josephine!)
3. Anyone who knows me (or reads my Facebook page, at least) knows about my deep and abiding love for “Law and Order: SVU”. However, I am pissed at the show right now…so much so that I am ready to break up with it if some changes don’t start happening. We are now 2 episodes into the new season, and like HALF THE CAST IS MISSING. No Munch, no Huang, no Cabot, no Warner; also, little to no Captain Cragen…like HELLO?!?! Bring back my Munchkins please, before I go out of my mind! Richard Belzer is more than half of the reason I watch the show. I am serious, SVU, if you replace him I will be enraged. Also, maybe give Munch more than like 6 lines per episode…refer to the episode “Painless” with Marlee Matlin where he is a huge part of the plot. Richard Belzer is a good actor. He can deliver serious lines as well as funny ones. Why am I the only person who is aware of this?
Look, I am into guest stars and all that, but if you are adding them to the show at the expense of the regular cast, that is stupid. People watch the show for Hargitay, Meloni, Belzer, and Ice-T, not for the guest stars. They are the reason the show has been on for 11 seasons now. Wentworth Miller = not a good actor and a REALLY obnoxious character on the first episode. Christine Baranski (aka Bitchy ADA) = also not a good character, and if she persists for more than like one or two more episodes heads will roll. Dude. Let us hearken back to the purer times of ADAs Cabot and Novak, where the ADA was fair, ethical, and was concerned more about doing her job than putting the detectives on the chopping block for doing theirs. Furthermore, bitchy for the sake of bitchy does not make an entertaining character, in my opinion (hence why I hated “Will & Grace”…I could not STAND Megan Mullaly as Karen on that show). So in conclusion, Show: I need more Munch and less stupid, gratuitous use of guest stars overshadowing the regular cast. Thanks.
1. Dude. I don’t know about anyone else, but I am SO SICK of hearing about Jon & Kate! I hate these people, and I don’t even know them. Every freaking media outlet in this country is completely mired in their drama at the moment, and I am sick as all holy hell of it. I turn on the radio? Jon & Kate. I turn on the news? Jon & Kate. I half expect to start seeing mosaics of them and collages of their life in museums. Seriously, media. Stop giving these people attention – that is all they want. He is a douche, she is a shrew. And unfortunately, neither of them, despite their many affirmations to the contrary, gives a rat’s ass about any of their kids, or else they wouldn’t be using them as leverage in their obnoxious he-said-she-said game. I don’t care who was at fault, and neither does anyone else. As far as I’m concerned, you’re both at fault. Watching that show was like watching a real-life Everybody Loves Raymond…husband is a lazy obnoxious pig, wife considered nagging her husband to be as necessary to her daily routine as breathing. I’m serious, if I EVER treat my husband like that, I want someone to shoot me. But I never WILL, because he would never act like Jon Gosselin to begin with, so it’s a moot point. Anyhoo, the people who are really suffering here are the innocent children…and the rest of America, who, like me, just want to stop hearing about this shit 28475682101 times a day.
2. I really like the fall, but the constant fluctuation in the temperature is seriously messing with me. Last week it was nice and cool and breezy, like fall weather should be, and yet this weekend, it was back to being 14 trillion degrees with 90% humidity. I am DONE with summer, I am over it (of course I was over it in June…I really don’t like summer to begin with, but that’s beside the point). PLEASE bring back the fall weather! And please do it soon! HOWEVER, if the gods of Fall Weather could bring it back WITHOUT the accompanying invasion of f-ing spiders into my house because the weather’s getting colder, that would be STELLAR. I swear, everywhere I looked this weekend in my house, I saw a spider. And Husband was not home to go all vigilante on them, so I cowered in fear in my car for most of the weekend hoping that they would all disappear. They did not. I loathe spiders, in case you people were wondering (except for Josephine, referred to in an earlier post…RIP Josephine!)
3. Anyone who knows me (or reads my Facebook page, at least) knows about my deep and abiding love for “Law and Order: SVU”. However, I am pissed at the show right now…so much so that I am ready to break up with it if some changes don’t start happening. We are now 2 episodes into the new season, and like HALF THE CAST IS MISSING. No Munch, no Huang, no Cabot, no Warner; also, little to no Captain Cragen…like HELLO?!?! Bring back my Munchkins please, before I go out of my mind! Richard Belzer is more than half of the reason I watch the show. I am serious, SVU, if you replace him I will be enraged. Also, maybe give Munch more than like 6 lines per episode…refer to the episode “Painless” with Marlee Matlin where he is a huge part of the plot. Richard Belzer is a good actor. He can deliver serious lines as well as funny ones. Why am I the only person who is aware of this?
Look, I am into guest stars and all that, but if you are adding them to the show at the expense of the regular cast, that is stupid. People watch the show for Hargitay, Meloni, Belzer, and Ice-T, not for the guest stars. They are the reason the show has been on for 11 seasons now. Wentworth Miller = not a good actor and a REALLY obnoxious character on the first episode. Christine Baranski (aka Bitchy ADA) = also not a good character, and if she persists for more than like one or two more episodes heads will roll. Dude. Let us hearken back to the purer times of ADAs Cabot and Novak, where the ADA was fair, ethical, and was concerned more about doing her job than putting the detectives on the chopping block for doing theirs. Furthermore, bitchy for the sake of bitchy does not make an entertaining character, in my opinion (hence why I hated “Will & Grace”…I could not STAND Megan Mullaly as Karen on that show). So in conclusion, Show: I need more Munch and less stupid, gratuitous use of guest stars overshadowing the regular cast. Thanks.
Monday, September 28, 2009
Things That Grind My Gears
Since I’m a lazy blogger, I decided to institute a weekly, themed blog post that will keep me writing at least one entry a week. In honor of the fact that Mondays, essentially, just plain suck, I am going to call it “Things That Grind My Gears” (a la Peter Griffin from “Family Guy”). I will use these weekly posts to whine, rant, and otherwise complain about a couple of things that have bothered me in the past week, thereby getting them off my chest and hopefully delaying the eventual shooting spree (THAT WAS A JOKE, FOR THE GOVERNMENT INTERNET MONITORS THAT MAY BE READING, BECAUSE I KNOW YOU ARE OUT THERE, AND NOT JUST BECAUSE RICHARD BELZER PROBABLY THINKS SO. SHOUT OUT TO RICHARD BELZER!!!)
So, without further ado, I present to you this week’s Things That Grind My Gears.
1. When Husband and I moved to Danbury right over the Bethel line, I was ecstatic because this meant I could start taking back roads to my office in Ridgefield instead of plodding along on Route 7 – abyss of the ass-clown, passageway of the puerile, bane of Southwestern Connecticut – every morning, my blood pressure skyrocketing and streams of expletives flowing from my mouth as I struggled to get to work on time amid the thousands of damn idiots in this state who do not know how to merge from two lanes down to one. However, I did not factor in one thing to my glee over being able to take back roads, and that is school buses. I’m not ranting against buses in general – I know the kiddoes have to get to school, and I am all for that. Education = good. But what I AM ranting against are the parents, in Redding and West Redding, mostly, who insist upon talking to their kid’s bus driver for 47252874 minutes while the bus is stopped to pick them up. Dude. There are PEOPLE BEHIND THE BUS. WHO HAVE TO GET TO WORK. In the grand scheme of things, the bus driver doesn’t care about what you had for breakfast or what the score of last night’s game was or whatever the hell it is you are jabbering on about while the rest of us wait for 5 minutes until you’re done with your conversation, and neither do I. I would like to get to my office sometime before the apocalypse, thank you.
2. Anyone who knows me well knows my deep-seated hatred for commercials. I despise them with a burning, white-hot passion that rocks the heavens. I am convinced that DVR was invented for people like me, for whom watching commercials is akin to water-boarding. But the commercials I hate most these days, beyond the shadow of a doubt, are the Geico caveman commercials. Boy howdy, do they make me want to put my foot through the television. The gecko is annoying, the stack-of-money-with-googly-eyes singing “Somebody’s Watching Me” has all but ruined my love for that excellent song, but the more TV I watch, the more I realize that the cavemen are probably what will eventually send me to the padded room. I hereby IMPLORE everyone reading this blog to appeal to my husband and/or family to please sign me up for DVR for Christmas. It will prevent bloodshed.
3. My internet connection at home is very spotty and inconsistent, especially on the desktop in the guest room which is where I do any and all non-office work. It kept prompting me to install my Windows updates, so I finally went to the Microsoft Update page recently to attempt to install XP Service Pack 3. The install begins, and I leave the room to do something else (which was my first mistake), and when I return later, my internet has disconnected, meaning that the install was interrupted halfway through. Given that it takes like 14 millenia to install Service Pack 3, I was pissed. And then, since the computer is smart enough to know that it didn’t install all the way (but not, apparently, smart enough to know that it should remain connected to the internet long enough for the install to complete), it goes and uninstalls the SP3 components that actually made it. And that takes another 6 decades. I have now tried this install 3 FRICKING TIMES, and every time the same thing happens. I should have bought a Mac!
And that wraps up this week’s Things That Grind My Gears. Feel free to comment with any of your own!
So, without further ado, I present to you this week’s Things That Grind My Gears.
1. When Husband and I moved to Danbury right over the Bethel line, I was ecstatic because this meant I could start taking back roads to my office in Ridgefield instead of plodding along on Route 7 – abyss of the ass-clown, passageway of the puerile, bane of Southwestern Connecticut – every morning, my blood pressure skyrocketing and streams of expletives flowing from my mouth as I struggled to get to work on time amid the thousands of damn idiots in this state who do not know how to merge from two lanes down to one. However, I did not factor in one thing to my glee over being able to take back roads, and that is school buses. I’m not ranting against buses in general – I know the kiddoes have to get to school, and I am all for that. Education = good. But what I AM ranting against are the parents, in Redding and West Redding, mostly, who insist upon talking to their kid’s bus driver for 47252874 minutes while the bus is stopped to pick them up. Dude. There are PEOPLE BEHIND THE BUS. WHO HAVE TO GET TO WORK. In the grand scheme of things, the bus driver doesn’t care about what you had for breakfast or what the score of last night’s game was or whatever the hell it is you are jabbering on about while the rest of us wait for 5 minutes until you’re done with your conversation, and neither do I. I would like to get to my office sometime before the apocalypse, thank you.
2. Anyone who knows me well knows my deep-seated hatred for commercials. I despise them with a burning, white-hot passion that rocks the heavens. I am convinced that DVR was invented for people like me, for whom watching commercials is akin to water-boarding. But the commercials I hate most these days, beyond the shadow of a doubt, are the Geico caveman commercials. Boy howdy, do they make me want to put my foot through the television. The gecko is annoying, the stack-of-money-with-googly-eyes singing “Somebody’s Watching Me” has all but ruined my love for that excellent song, but the more TV I watch, the more I realize that the cavemen are probably what will eventually send me to the padded room. I hereby IMPLORE everyone reading this blog to appeal to my husband and/or family to please sign me up for DVR for Christmas. It will prevent bloodshed.
3. My internet connection at home is very spotty and inconsistent, especially on the desktop in the guest room which is where I do any and all non-office work. It kept prompting me to install my Windows updates, so I finally went to the Microsoft Update page recently to attempt to install XP Service Pack 3. The install begins, and I leave the room to do something else (which was my first mistake), and when I return later, my internet has disconnected, meaning that the install was interrupted halfway through. Given that it takes like 14 millenia to install Service Pack 3, I was pissed. And then, since the computer is smart enough to know that it didn’t install all the way (but not, apparently, smart enough to know that it should remain connected to the internet long enough for the install to complete), it goes and uninstalls the SP3 components that actually made it. And that takes another 6 decades. I have now tried this install 3 FRICKING TIMES, and every time the same thing happens. I should have bought a Mac!
And that wraps up this week’s Things That Grind My Gears. Feel free to comment with any of your own!
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